The Beginning of Em(ily)
I am a daughter, sister, aunt, cousin and granddaughter by birthright.
I choose to be a friend, employee, mentor and volunteer.
I choose to be grateful and generous in each of these roles and hope to steward them well.
I was born on 17 December 1992 and am the daughter of Anthony Mervyn Christian and Diosdada Baronda Christian. I was born in Saipan, the Commonwealth of the Northern Mariana Islands (USA).
My siblings are: Anthony Stewart Christian, Katherine Anne Christian, Rodalyn Baronda Christian, Robert Baronda Christian, Frank Sambetan Christian, and I also have an unnamed twin who didn't get the opportunity to breathe a breath here on Earth.
Both my parents had previous marriages, but met each other in the Philippines. They had a wedding there and in the Northern Mariana Islands (where I was born) to honour family and friends in both countries. We moved from the Northern Mariana Islands, to the Philippines, to New Zealand, to Sydney, New South Wales, Australia all before the age of 2. We finally resided in the Gold Coast, Queensland, Australia where my younger brother was born and we obtained Australian Citizenship.
Immigrating to another country for the betterment of your family is no small feat. I am only beginning to fathom the courage and selflessness this kind of sacrifice requires. I am eternally thankful for my family.
I was afforded the opportunity to attend King's Christian College after transferring from Benowa State Primary School. I was only 7 years old and commenced Grade 3 in 2000. I also remember attending the Sydney Olympics that year, although I was just a child and didn’t understand the significance of the Olympics. I have many fond memories of my Christian schooling. Many staff there went the "extra mile" to look out for me, although I encountered bullying, which is not unique to any community. Gossip, comparison, jealousy… Let’s just say: sin corrupts people and we all encounter it everyday. Good education is important.
It took many years of me observing Christian communities to find the greener grass/pastures that were on the other side of the salvation gate. I remember attending a good friend's birthday party where all of his family and friends were gathered and they shared stories, encouraging words and prayed for him on his birthday. I was completely undone and was crying. Christian families showed me a great, heavenly love.
I participated in school events like chapels, school camps, musicals, eisteddfods (a festival that includes competitions in music, poetry, and other performing arts), sporting carnivals and many other extra curricular activities. I was not fully aware of the spiritual significance of what I was doing at the time, but it led me along the straight and narrow path until I was ready to make a decision for myself. I was afforded a music scholarship in primary school which encouraged me to lean in further to do well and maintain both my grades and invest more into the school community (although I was already invested from the relationships I had with friends, teachers and everything associated with the school). I thoroughly enjoyed swimming, was House Vice Captain, Prefect, Waterpolo Captain, participated in 40-hour famine and many other fundraising ventures. I have many fond memories of my schooling.
The Salvation of Em(ily)
At the age of 14, in 2007, I remember an invitation to hear a good friend (now Professor, Dr Scott Douglas Blakemore) speaking at a Youth Group meeting on a Friday night. I was not often allowed to go out on a Friday night, but my friend had come back from a mission trip to the Philippines and I was eager to hear what he had to say due to my mother being from the Philippines. He shared the signs, miracles and wonders he encountered while he was there and I was dumbfounded. I have known him since my first day at this school, been to his birthday party, met his family and there he was telling me about miracles which seemed like the kind of thing you only see in fantasy movies or novels.
At that moment, I analysed the facts. I know this guy, know his family, he is an academic and I had no doubt that he would lie about this. He and his family were a living testimony of Jesus. In my humble seat with my eyes closed and earnestly seeking truth, I remember saying something along these lines to a God in the universe: "God, I believe what he says is real, I know him. If you're real... I know you're real... I want to know you like he knows you." At that moment, I fell to my knees at my seat in the auditorium and it felt like I was the only person in the room. Tears streamed down my face and I encountered God, repenting (turning from my old ways and confessing him as Lord of my life). No one led me in a prayer of repentance (I have heard them many times in the Christian environment I was in), but what happened to me was divine.
I had what I know now to be a prophetic, open-vision and saw stadiums throughout the world worshipping Jesus. I felt the Lord say that I will be instrumental in these stadiums/conferences/festivals. From that day forward I would often have words for people as I prayed for them, but had no idea it was a prophetic gift. Many people have planted seeds, watered, harvested and I have resown into many others' lives. I was also baptised in water and fire that same year through impartation. I gained many spiritual families (mothers and fathers as well as brothers and sisters in the faith that have helped guide me along the way). There is much to learn about the importance of prayer, spiritual covering and from my experience with people, the crucial role of present mothers and fathers and grandparents as well as what role the body of believers plays.
A love for travelling translated to a heart for missions. A love for music translated to a heart for worship. A love for academic achievement translated to a heart for excellence. A love for helping friends translated to a heart for hospitality, administration and pastoring. A love for team sport translated to building teams and team culture in church and workplaces. I have had the opportunity to volunteer in mission trips in: Philippines, Mozambique, New Zealand, India and Australia. I have also been a key part in facilitating conferences/festivals in these nations as well.
Don't get me wrong, life definitely did not get any easier after salvation. If anything, it became much harder, but Holy Spirit counselled me through and taught me many things. One of the hardest things to grapple with was my father's terminal cancer diagnosis where he was given only months to live. I truly believe faith has prolonged his life from just a few months to still being alive today after way too many “close calls”.
Em(ily) of Today
Fast-forwarding 17, nearly 18 years later, I have carried much grief, shame, guilt, addictions and partnered with many lies. The Christian life is not a sprint but a marathon and we need not only our own faith, but the encouragement we find in the body of believers to hold fast to our convictions and remind us of Jesus Christ in us. It's not by works that we are saved, but in Christ alone (remembering his finished work) and we need to be reminded of this. We are not called to do life alone, but have been grafted into a family of believers.
What does life look like today? It has not been an easy journey and reality is a hard pill to swallow. I suffered a schizophrenic psychotic break 2 years ago and have been in and out of hospitals and various medical professionals navigating mental illnesses and trauma. I was assaulted, encountered medical negligence, bullying and many injustices. I'm far from the person I was before, but these experiences have rekindled a fire in my heart, eyes, soul, spirit and bones to come back to the bold and child-like faith I had as a teenager and in my early years in the faith.
I hope this encourages you to not lose faith, hope and love.
"Love never fails. But whether there are prophecies, they will fail; whether there are tongues, they will cease; whether there is knowledge, it will vanish away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part. But when that which is perfect has come, then that which is in part will be done away. When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things. For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part, but then I shall know just as I also am known.
And now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love." 1 Corinthians 13:8-13 (NKJV)
I challenge you to be boldly vulnerable and reflect on your beliefs. At what point are you saved? Is it in a single moment of confession or a life journey confessing salvation?
“At that time the disciples came to Jesus, saying, “Who then is greatest in the kingdom of heaven?” Then Jesus called a little child to Him, set him in the midst of them, and said, “Assuredly, I say to you, unless you are converted and become as little children, you will by no means enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore whoever humbles himself as this little child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. Whoever receives one little child like this in My name receives Me.” Matthew 18:1-5 NKJV
I challenge you to reflect on your child-like, awe and wonder. I encourage you not to limit God but depend on Him, again.
Seek help, we all need help.
“Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it. Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and belonging and joy - the experiences that make us the most vulnerable. Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light.” Brene Brown
Own your story. Be vulnerable. Be brave.
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